Modern Love

I promised a blog entry regarding the products that I'd sneak onto the desert island (still cringing) if that fate befell me.  Now that I'm in my thirties, I've really started to find myself being loyal to products that work for me.  Then again, some things that worked when I was younger just ain't cutting the mustard anymore.  I have tons of things that I adore, but I thought that I'd limit today's jewels to cosmetics and hygiene products.  Sound like a deal?  Okay, here we go...

Every girl needs a good cleanser.  This comes from my years being brainwashed as an Estee Lauder beauty advisor, however I have to admit that it really is good advice.  An ideal cleanser will remove most make up and all the dirt and oil accumulated on your gorgeous mug throughout the day.  If you wear waterproof makeup, you'll need an actual makeup remover but that's another entry.  My favorite cleanser happens to be a cheapie that you can actually afford!  Remember, I'm a bitch on a budget.  L'oreal Go Clean is the best that I've found.  I have combo skin and this isn't too drying or too harsh.  I have to admit that I do love that little scrubbie thingie, too. 

My Estee Lauder brainwashing told me that I must include a toner but I'll be honest with you, I just don't care for this step.  If that's your thing, go for it.  Some chicks need it.  I'm not in that crowd.  Up next for me is a fabulous moisturizer.  This is SUPER important.  And you can't use the same shit you put on your body.  Your face has delicate skin.  I assume that most of you reading are around the same age as myself... We have to start thinking about fighting off those wrinkles!

 

Korres Pomegranate Balancing Moisturiser rocks my socks. It's like a gel... But a cream.  It's light enough not to feel like I'm wearing an oily mask, but rich enough to actually give me some moisture.  I dig it.  And for the price, it ain't too bad.

Now it's time for the fun stuff... Makeup!  If you don't like makeup, you're a Communist.  I'm just sayin.  Anyway, before you start spackling yourself up, you need to get rid of those pothole sized pores on your nose and cheeks.

Benefit: The POREfessional is that exact spackle you need.  Yes, for a little tube it has a pretty big price.  But you have to understand...  It fills in the giant crater sized pores that could house small orphaned children.  That's worth the money.  A little dab goes a long way.  And it's translucent, so it's not changing your face to some weird color.  I've even worn it without other makeup over it and it works fab.

 

I'm a believer in mineral makeup.  It's one of those things that you're either totally for, or you're totally aghast at.  I don't have too many breakouts or scars to cover (just that one bullet hole), so I don't need theatrical coverage.  Bare Minerals Foundation is really the only choice.  Accept no impostors.  Yes, it may look scary all loosey goosey in that little pot... I understand if you're OCD you may have a hard time with it.  It comes with a great brush, called a kabuki, for application.  I've found that a tissue on my bathroom counter alleviates powder fallout.  Go with one of Bare Escentuals "Get Started" kits to begin with.  The coverage is sheer and build-able.  You can thank me later.  Just Tweet me @NoelleSebastian.

It has kind of a dirty name, and I like that about it.  It's also one of the most popular blushes EVER, and for good reason.  NARS Blush in Orgasm (yep, exactly) makes almost any girl look like she just... Well, you know.

 

There are a million and three eyeshadows out there and I could spend a whole blog talking about the ones I love.  For everyday, I wear something that's not even really considered an eyeshadow at all.  It's also made by Bare Escentuals, and it's an all over face color called Pure Radiance. It gives your eyes a little shimmer and a pick-me-up without being too over the top.  It's all you need at the office with a swipe of eyeliner and some good mascara.  Speaking of which...

Eyeliners piss me off most of the time.  They're either too chalky and don't glide on like they should, or they're so oily that they smudge and you end up looking like Rocky Raccoon by your morning coffee break.  Neither of those situations instills much hope in eyeliner wearers of the world.  Behold, Urban Decay 24/7 Glide-On Eye Pencil.  These pencils are the perfect balance of smooth and long-lasting.  They aren't waterproof, which in my book is a plus because I hate waterproof shit around my eyes.  They come in lots of sparkly, pretty colors, but honestly my favorite is called Zero, and it's the basic black.  Around the holidays, Sephora has gift sets where you can get a bunch of these little babies at once for a killer deal.  And hey, the holidays are just around the corner.  Santa, are you taking notes?

Before we can even talk mascara, we have to talk about the device depicted above.  An eyelash curler is essential, unless you're lucky enough to have perfectly curled and long, lush lashes.  If you are one of those people, poop on you.  Anyway, it's painless and it takes about 5 seconds for each eye.  The difference it makes is pretty remarkable.  I love my Tweezerman curler.

I'm like the Goldilocks of mascaras.  This one is too thick; this one is too thin; the brush on this one is all wrong...  I picked up a gift set of sample sized mascaras from Sephora after Valentine's Day this year, and the winner from that pack was Tarte's Lights, Camera, Lashes!  It does everything in one tube:  Curls, volumizes, conditions AND lengthens.  What more could you want?  And for me, the formula is just right.

I'm definitely the type of girl who doesn't feel dressed until I have some perfume on.  I like clean scents.  If it has too much musk or it's too flowery, I just can't hang.  I want something that not only I like sniffing at, but men do as well.  So far, Clean Shower Fresh has made a good impression on both genders alike. The Clean perfume line has at least 5 scents, probably more.  I just happen to be diggin on this one right now... But when it runs out I might go for something a little more Autumnal.  Or maybe not.  Woman's prerogative.

Anyway, my only other piece of advice is to get yourself enrolled in the Sephora rewards program and look for kits with stuff you want to try whenever possible.  It makes a big difference.

And is anyone else cringing about the desert island oxymoron?  Still just me?  Geez.

*Today's entry title is from Matt Nathanson's new album, conveniently titled "Modern Love"

Back In The Saddle

I'd say that over a month of not posting a new entry to my blog is a little excessive.  Things in the Noelle world have been a little topsy-turvy to say the least.  I have a lot to say, but I think for now a list of updates is all I can muster.  I have to ease myself back into this.  It's like exercising, I think.  You can't just go balls to the wall your first day out.  So here's the scoop, in case you were wondering what the hell happened to me.

• I'm living in Orlando now.  Longwood, actually.  Longwood is NOT Orlando, as I've been told, but for all intents and purposes, it's close enough.
• I've started sending out my resume and looking for a job again.  I still will be going to school, but I need cash flow and I'm going bonkers with nothing to do over the summer.  Liquidity AND purpose will make me a happy girl.
• After a lot of soul searching and reflection, I'm converting to Catholicism.  I may have mentioned this in a previous post, but I went to my local parish and signed up for the classes I have to take before I can be baptized, confirmed and receive my first communion on Easter Vigil (the Saturday before Easter Sunday) next year.  Classes start in September, and are every Sunday after Mass and every Monday night at 7:00.  Prince Charming is my sponsor, and I've asked his mother to be my Godmother.  I can say without reservation that the decision to become Catholic is not at all influenced by him or his family.  I've been searching for, groping for, wishing for something right for a long time.  After attending Mass a few times, I felt deep down in my bones that I've finally found what's right for me.
• If you know me, you'll know that for a very, very long time I've said that in order for me to run, someone would have to be chasing me.  Not to be a hypocrite, but I've changed my tune.  One of my friends has taken up running, and she blogs about it frequently.  She's inspired me to give it a try.  A real try, not just go out once and then give up.  If I can get into it, which I think I can, I'm going to start training for a triathlon.  I know that sounds incredibly crazy coming from me, but I need to get myself in shape before I hit the big 3-0 in a few months.  Obviously I won't be ready to throw down by then, but I'll at least have some tone and look good in pictures.  Vanity drives a girl to do things differently, ya know.
• My very favorite artist, Matt Nathanson, has a new album coming out on June 21 called Modern Love.  I own ALL his other stuff and it's awesome.  I'll be buying the new stuff on iTunes the day it comes out.  It might seem like a strange thing to be so excited about, but this album has been a long time in the making.  I follow him on Twitter, and I've been charting the progress of Modern Love for a while.  If you're into Indie rock, you should definitely check him out here.
• I've deleted my Facebook account.  If you're dying to find out what I'm up to, you'll have to come here or follow me on Twitter.  I'm pretty obsessed with Twitter and also with FourSquare.  Thank you iPhone, for turning me into a freak.  Okay, I was already a freak...
• The Casey Anthony trial started today.  If you aren't familiar with it, just do a little Googling.  I'm obsessed with it.  I'd LOVE to be a paralegal working on that case.  Prosecution or defense, I wouldn't care.  It's super juicy.

So that's the latest in my world.  I hope you haven't all tuned out completely.  All seven or eight of you, that is!  If you're the praying sort, please say a little one for me on my job search.  If not, could you think positive thoughts for me? 

Bone In The Throat

In the past, I've posted lists of things that annoy me.  I don't know if it's a side effect of getting older (my birthday is next week, dreadful), or just that I find more things to be pissed about.  Maybe it's a combination of both, like the old man who gets pissed at the kids on his lawn.  Whatever the reason, my list is longer.  Here are a few things that have irked me as of late, in no particular order of course.

• The excessive use of exclamation points.  In previous posts, I think I have committed this sin.  Henceforth, that will not be happening.  The exclamation point has a time and a place, just like the question mark does.  You wouldn't put a question mark at the end of a statement.  Stop using !!!! like you're in middle school.
• People who don't read.  Is it because you're stupid?  Really, if you don't read at all, you appear pretty stupid.
• Not responding to text messages, emails, voice mails or other communication.  I highly doubt that anyone is so busy that they can't shoot off a quick text message.  Are your thumbs broken?  That's possibly the only good excuse.
• Poor spelling.  In an age where just about every form of communication has a spell check, there is no excuse for blatantly poor spelling.  My iPhone predicts words I could hardly dream of.  
• Gray hairs, particularly mine.  Other people's gray hairs don't bother me.  I'm not even 29 yet.  There is no need for this kind of hair drama in my life.
• People who claim to not like animals.  I've encountered this twice in the past couple weeks.  I'm sorry, you cannot be trusted.
• Anything "fat-free".  What's there instead of the fat?  Chemicals?  I'll take a little fat, thanks.  
• Online discussion boards for college classes.  I'm not there to discuss shit, I'm there to get my degree.  Talk amongst yourselves, but don't require me to participate.

Just to even things out, here are a few things that really make me happy.

• Someone cooking for me.  This list may be in no particular order, but that is definitely number one.  This is especially true if it's unexpected.  Even better if the food is good, but honestly that isn't a prerequisite.
• Concerts.  I saw Dave Matthews Band last month (as referenced in a previous post), I'm seeing John Mayer this coming week and Anberlin in November.  Live music makes me feel alive.  I dunno, call me a dork.
• Fried chicken.  My ass proves it.
• Learning.  This whole going-back-to-college thing has really made me feel good about myself.  I'm being productive and I feel like my brain is getting a workout.
• Pedicures, manicures, hair styling, facials and massages.  I'm a chick.  I love to be pampered.
• Sleep.  I don't get all that much of it thanks to some serious insomnia, but when I do get it, it's downright blissful.

That's enough for now.  I needed a little rant.  I just thought I'd throw in some good stuff to keep my chi in balance and my zen aligned... Or whatever.

Lists and Lists and Lists

A couple years ago, on my previous blog, I wrote a 'bucket list' in two parts.  I think it's good to have one, and although I haven't checked anything off it yet, I know that these are the things I want to work toward.  I went back and revisited it, and I found that some of the things that used to be on there were no longer things I really cared that much about.  For instance "walk down the aisle" has been deleted.  Not because I don't want to ever get married, but because I'll do it when and if the time is right, not because it's on a list of things I have to do before I kick it. 


I'm a notorious list maker.  I never, ever go on a trip without making a list of things I need to pack.  I can't conceive of going to the grocery store without a list.  It's not that I'm not spontaneous, because I am.  It's just that in some cases, I'd rather be prepared.  So I guess life is a good situation to be prepared for, hence the list.  I hate calling it a bucket list because of that Morgan Freeman/Jack Nicholson movie.  I'd rather just call it what I called it before that movie came out:  The List.  Here's the revised version (in no particular order).



    * Tour Italy.  The entire country, not just Rome and Venice.

    *  See the Grand Canyon and take the hokey donkey ride to the canyon floor and back.

    * Fly a plane solo.

    *  Drive the entire length of the Pacific Coast Highway.

    * Have one complete tasting course at The French Laundry in Napa Valley, CA.

    *  Drive on the Autobahn.  (That's my manly wish).

    *  Go parasailing.

    *  See the Great Wall of China.

    * Get a tattoo that says “one step at a time” across the top of my right foot.

    * Go to Greece… Especially Athens.

    * See the Christ the Redeemer statue in Rio de Janiero, Brazil.

    * See The Barenaked Ladies in concert.

    * Eat the Southern Buffet at The Lady and Sons in Savannah.

    * Learn to do a proper tango.

    * Go to a Cirque du Soliel show.

    * Go on a sunset sail on one of the tall ships in Key West.

     * Swim with dolphins.

    * Visit Vietnam.

    * Go to Charleston, SC.

    * Get some of my writing published properly (not just in blog form).

    * Go on a safari in Africa.

    * Eat tapas in Spain.

    * Cook in a professional kitchen, even if just for a day.

    * Visit the place where my family settled in the New World, Hyde Park and Margaretville, New York.

    * Go on the Ferris wheel at Navy Pier in Chicago.

    * Get my degree.

    * Get away from it all in Fiji.

    * Take a cruise through the Panama Canal.

    * Go to Alaska.

Noelle Lately

I've talked a little about this subject in previous posts, but I want to spend a little more time on it today.  If you don't know anything about websites, then bear with me for a minute while I break this down.  In fact, I'll just say it so you get the point.  I know when you look at my blog.  I have a web tracker that logs your IP address, along with other info like your city, state, web browser, OS, linked page, time spent on my site, etc.  As a certified internet lurker (a/k/a web stalker), this information comes in verrrry handy to me.  Basically, I know what you're up to.  I can tell who's been looking at what, when and for how long.  It's interesting because I get hits from extremely random places:  Fargo, ND; Jakarta, Indonesia; Mountain Valley, CA; Moscow City, Russia and Rio de Janiero, Brazil to name a few.  I don't know anyone in any of the aforementioned places, but I think it's great that I have a diverse readership.  I write this blog mostly for my friends and myself, but I also write it for anyone to read, and I hope that people will link back and visit again and again.

If I know you, then I know when you're looking at my page.  Granted, I have more than one friend in most places, so it's not as easy to narrow down:  If you're in Palm Bay, FL, then you'll remain somewhat anonymous, as I have many friends there.  However if you live in, say, Canton, GA (Hello there!!), then I know who you are!  Believe me, you can glean a lot of information about me from my posts, but I always keep them somewhat cryptic to protect the guilty parties.  I never name names, unless they've been changed.  In fact, you don't even know my name unless you know me personally.  If I'm interested in finding out something about someone, you can damn sure bet that I will FB stalk, Google and use any other electronic means necessary to gain information about them.  This interweb business is, after all, a two way street.

Those of you who look at my blog every single day... Know that I'm never going to post every day.  You won't miss much by missing a day or two.  My life, sadly, just isn't that exciting.  But in the interest of those who do, I've created a list of random facts to bring you up to speed on Noelle Lately.  Here we go:

• I listen to Lady Antebellum, Alkaline Trio, Matt Nathanson and Miley fuckin' Cyrus cranked up in the car with the windows rolled down, singing along at the top of my lungs.  It's good stress relief.
• I'm working out religiously, and definitely starting to see results.
• I still have no idea what the hell I'm doing, but that's just how I roll.
• I have a crush on Craig Ferguson from The Late Late Show.
• Never in my life have I cared less what people think of me, unless they're my family and friends.
• I do NOT miss the life I had in Tampa.
• I'm more confident now than I've ever been, and I have no one but myself to thank for it.
• I'm cooking less, but better, than I have in the past.
• I'm proud of the fact that I'm quirky.
• I spend enough time on Facebook that I should work for them.
• My best friend is still the same person as when I was 16.
• I've raised my standards in the dating game quite a bit.  Those who may have passed muster in the past no longer would make the cut.
• I still don't understand Conservative Republicans, and probably never will... Although I count a couple of my closest friends in the world among them.
• Semisonic said it best when they said, "I'm feeling strangely fine."

So that's it for now.  I suggest to those of you who look everyday at this thing, get a life.  I know I have.

Laundry List

With the risk of sounding like a total bitch (which, incidentally, I am) I've decided to have myself a little rant.  I've been thinking a lot lately about what I want in a potential mate/suitor/boyfriend/whatever.  I've found that the list has gotten longer since I was last single... So I guess that means I at least learned something from my last go 'round.  I think other women my age will certainly identify with some of these standards.  I'm all for feedback, so leave a comment if you have something to say--good or otherwise.

• Be decisive.  How fucking hard is it to make a decision?  I don't want it all left to me.  Be man enough to take ownership of at least some situations.  Own it, whether the outcome is good or hellacious.  I know what I want, so why don't you?
• Have a good sense of humor.  That said, don't get too damn carried away.  Personally attacking me is never funny.  If you can't find your edit button, ask someone to help you out.  If you have diarrhea mouth, it doesn't bode well for our outcome.  Example:  Telling me to shut my legs because something smells funny is possibly one of the worst offenses EVER.  If you think that's funny, fuck you.
• Don't be a picky eater.  Once you're past adolescence, this is unacceptable behavior.  I like to eat.  A lot.  I want to try everything.  If you have some weird aversion to onions or something, you need to snap out of it.  The one thing I absolutely abhor, green peppers, I'll tolerate to try something new.  You just never know what you'll like until you try it.
• Have an open mind.  This goes back to the food thing, but I mean it in a much broader sense... I have no interest in dating someone who has some kind of backwoods view on anything.  If you can't be progressive and at least try to see things through someone else's eyes, then what the hell am I doing with you?  Easy answer:  I won't be with you for long.
• Want more.  I don't mean monetarily.  Expect more from yourself.  Hold yourself to high standards.  Fight for what you believe in.  Have dreams.  Never be sedentary.  Have a goal and work toward achieving it.  I like determination.
• Value your family.  I value mine more than I can say.  I think it speaks volumes about someone's character that they are close with their family.  Obviously sometimes your family is shitty.  I understand that.  However, I think it's important to be close with someone in your family at least.
• Take care of yourself.  Be good to yourself.  That means taking time to do the things you enjoy, going to the doctor when you're sick, eating right and at least trying to exercise.  I do those things for myself, and I think it's important that you do as well.
• Don't be critical.  I won't be if you aren't.  I don't respond well to criticism.  It's my nature to block out that kind of stuff.  I think it's counterproductive in a relationship.
• Communicate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Seriously, this isn't hard.  We don't have to talk about mushy, feelings-y stuff all the time.  If there's something on your mind, say it.  Don't bottle up how you feel until you can't take it any more.  That's only going to piss me off, much more than telling me when it was a little thing would've.
• Be mindful of the little things.  Grand gestures of romance are much appreciated, but it's the little, everyday things that are most important.  Returning text messages, holding hands, opening the door for me, expressing your love/affection... Those are the things that make a relationship special.
• Don't be a wuss.  There's nothing I like less than a guy with no backbone.  That being said, refer back to "don't be critical" to make sure you aren't getting carried away, buddy.
• Have your own life.  Big warning signs that you're not for me:  You live with your parents and you don't have a good reason for it (i.e. you've been laid off, you're in school).  You do everything your friends do, and you consult them for every decision.  You need my opinion before taking action on even the littlest thing.  
• Be gainfully employed.  Or going to school.  Or both.  I don't do losers.
• Check your baggage.  We all have suitcases full of crap from past relationships.  No matter what you've been through in the past, I'm not the girl who did it to you.  Don't take it out on me.  

There's more, but those are the big things...  Feedback is welcome.  Don't think I'll be nice, though :)

Utter Annoyances

*This is probably the first in a series of rant-y lists about things that drive me to drink.

I'm a Virgo. If you're into the horoscope stuff, then you'll know that means that I'm passionate, but for the most part fairly level-headed. I tend to stick fairly closely to what the stars have to say about my personality. There are some things that I'm very obsessive-compulsive about (another Virgo-ish trait). Then there are things that make me want to spazz out like a super biatch, drop f-bombs all over the place and collapse in a heap of exhausted, grumpy, half-hearted tears. Actually, the tears are mostly just from all the rage. Rage makes me weepy. Getting all worked up can make a girl retain water. Once all the drama has passed, you've gotta get rid of it somehow. I figure weeping is damn sure better than peeing your pants. Here are some things that really, really irk the crap outta me:

• The untrained proctologist behind me in traffic whose hood I can't see because he's so close to my bumper, waving his hand out the window and shouting loudly about how I should GO. Go where exactly? Have you taken a look around, jackass? There is a vehicle directly in front of me and ones ALL AROUND US. We're parked. No one is going anywhere. I'm certainly not going anywhere... But you know where you can go? Straight to Hell.
• Cashiers who don't acknowledge your existence. Listen, I know your job sucks. I've had your job before. Nearly 99% of all the people you wait on day and and day out are complete and utter d-bags. I get it, believe me, I do. But I'm not among those 99%. I make sure to say hello and to thank you for helping me. I know it's your job to help me, but like I said, I know how much it blows. So if you can't have the friggin courtesy to look up at me and mutter a hello and "have a nice day," back at me, you should go back to playing World of Warcraft in your mommy's basement. You suck donkey nuts.
• Girls who aren't funny. Is there anything on earth more annoying than a woman with no sense of humor whatsoever? Ohmigod these women should be put out of their misery already. There are quite a few in the office where I work, and I just wonder how they survive their miserable, dejected lives. I find nothing wrong with having a serious nature, but damn! Live a little. Once in a while you have to crack a freaking smile at least.
• Indecisiveness. Make up your damn mind already!!! There is only so much "I don't know, what do you want to do?" that a girl can take. Take charge. I won't be mad.
• Picky eaters. Once you pass the age of 12, there is NO excuse for not trying new foods unless you're allergic to something. If all you'll eat is Spaghetti-Oh's and Twinkies, then my opinion is that you're a fat wimp. If you're female you probably fit into the 'girls who aren't funny' category, too. You don't have to go all Bizarre Foods and start eating pig anus, but try something new at the Thai restaurant or eat a piece of sushi. Or like my boyfriend, who's afraid of cheesecake (can you imagine??), just try something you think you don't like again. Tastes change. Stop being such an old stick in the mud.
• Jumpsuits. Seriously, this is in fashion again? Look at people in Hollywood trying to pull them off. If they look ridiculous on those skinny little bitches on 90210 who eat half a lettuce leaf twice a week, then there isn't an ice cube's chance in India that it's ever going to look remotely good on you. Just sayin.

Rant over... For now. I feel marginally less irritated now. :-)

Deja Vu Again...

It's been quite a while since I've blogged. The old blog on myspace is still available for viewing, but who really even uses myspace anymore? I know I don't. It's all about Facebook and Twitter now. I have to say I just can't get into Twittering... Or is it Tweeting... Twatting? That can't be right. Anyway, I have a Twitter account that I use solely for celeb-stalking. I think I've posted maybe 5 Tweets (Twatts? Egads, that's almost pornographic!) in 6 months. I just can't get into it. I guess that's because I'm just too damn long winded to be satisfied with a 160 character limit. Something I find a little bit disturbing about the whole Twitter phenomenon is the sheer volume of posts some people have. You would think that someone like Demi Moore would have better things to do than post a Tweeter (whatever, seriously) about what she ate for lunch, or how amazingly handsome her husband is. We get it, Demi. You bagged a dude that could date your daughter and not be looked at funny. You won't see this girl giving you kudos. When you're older and the plastic surgery just can't save you from looking your age anymore, you might end up getting Punk'd by your sweet little man-muffin. Don't say I didn't warn you.

As usual I'll most likely be ranting on here about something or another that no one but me cares about. Hey, it's your precious time you're wasting reading what I write. I thought, to get things started on the right foot, I'd leave you with a list of things that I've learned since rounding the corner toward the big 3-0.

• Nothing is worth holding a grudge over. Grudges are a huge waste of energy.
• No matter how much they pinch or give you blisters, if the shoes are cute enough, it's worth the pain.
• The love of an animal can soothe your soul in the way no human ever could.
• Sex appeal is highly overrated.
• Generosity and kindness are extremely scarce in this world.
• Having your own opinion doesn't necessarily mean you must voice it.

There are many, many more but I'll leave those for another day and another post. Until then...