My posts have gotten a little touchy-feely lately, and for that I apologize. I'm warning you up front, dear reader, that this is another one of those posts. So I'm in a happy place. Sue me. I promise to resume my usual derision-filled rants soon enough. For now, let me have my moment.
I like the term "happy accident". Sometimes things have a way of happening that turn out to be better than you could have imagined. I love that. With life being so stressful and filled with disappointments, a happy accident once in a while definitely helps me keep the faith. What exactly do I mean? Well, basically anything unexpected that seems to just fall out of the sky, especially when you're really looking in the other direction. That's what an accident is anyway, isn't it? Unplanned, unscripted... It doesn't have to be a car crash. It can be an impromptu cup of coffee with someone that stops your heart for a second or two. Doesn't that sound lovely?
Yes, it certainly does. Imagine my surprise when that's what fell into my lap yesterday afternoon. I had been chatting with someone for a while and we decided to meet for Starbucks and conversation. I had absolutely zero expectations, other than getting my caramel macchiato fix. So when I found myself leaning closer, speaking more softly, laughing a little more... I was definitely surprised, and most pleasantly. Yesterday gave way to a stressful morning today (I shall leave those details out, as they have nothing to do with this little story) and then there I was again with this new person.
After spending the better part of the afternoon together (driving to the Port to look at the ships, walking on the beach, eating the world's best fried chicken), I was starting to feel a little dazed. The rest of the world was starting to fall away and seem a little out of focus. Before I knew it, the proverbial clock struck midnight. Responsibilities beckoned. Just like that, it was over and I was in my car driving home with my heart beating so erratically that I felt a little light-headed. Honestly, dear reader, it's been years since my heart has felt more than even a tiny blip on its radar. To say I was blind-sided would probably be a fairly accurate description of today's events.
So what now? I haven't a clue. I wish I could wrap this story up with a pretty little bow, but you and I both know that life rarely works that way. He's on his way back to Memphis... His home. And here I am, with an erratic heartbeat. I'd love to be able to say that I could sustain myself on a few precious hours of whatever it was that was happening between us. I wish that I could. I can't. It wasn't nearly enough. Imagine a divine dessert, placed in front of you with a spoon and a welcome. After one or two bites, that lovely plate is taken away, and the sweetness lingers... But really, you'd just love a couple more spoonfuls. Or the whole plate. Or the whole dessert, do you mind bringing the pan out from the kitchen? That little bit you were lucky enough to taste couldn't be enough to satisfy. That's how I feel.
Happy. Very happy. Wanting more. We shall see...